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If it’s “to get to know someone”, you’ll probably seem interview-ish. People like being around fun, low-pressure people with no expectations.

The best way to look at a date is a chance to have fun. As things progress, that’s when you get to know each other.

It’s true that being overly available can seem desperate or unattractive, but the last thing you want to do is play dating games.

If you’re suffering from no-life syndrome, step back and ask yourself why you aren’t having fun on your own. Play the sport you like or pursue one of your interests. Insecure people push for serious relationships for the security it brings, and people can sense that.

Dating Tips and Q&A with Yours Truly I wrote the first version of this article in 2012, and since then I’ve gotten hundreds of emails and comments asking about what to do in certain situations.

Here are the most common questions and my answers to each.

3) This Secret Psychology Brain Hack Here’s a way to discover how you might be sabotaging yourself without knowing it.

Q: I’ve been dating this person for months, and when I ask if we’re a serious couple or not, the subject gets changed or I get ignored altogether. One, they’re interested but not good at communicating or are feeling pressured and don’t like it.If you emotionally vomit on someone and spill your whole life story during the first three dates, where’s the fun in that?It’s like telling someone what’s in the present they’re about to unwrap. Focus on having fun, enjoy the mystery, and going from casual to serious will happen naturally.Meeting Friends Meeting each other’s social group is a big step.If you make it past the gauntlet of scrutiny from their friends, things are well on their way.

Q: I’ve been dating this person for months, and when I ask if we’re a serious couple or not, the subject gets changed or I get ignored altogether. One, they’re interested but not good at communicating or are feeling pressured and don’t like it.If you emotionally vomit on someone and spill your whole life story during the first three dates, where’s the fun in that?It’s like telling someone what’s in the present they’re about to unwrap. Focus on having fun, enjoy the mystery, and going from casual to serious will happen naturally.Meeting Friends Meeting each other’s social group is a big step.If you make it past the gauntlet of scrutiny from their friends, things are well on their way. Other times you really like someone and it doesn’t work out, and you’ve probably wondered if there was anything you could’ve done differently.